不那么抱歉：虐待者、虚假道歉和宽恕的界限（有声读物）

2024 | English | B0CYDSF5ZK | M4B 64 kbps | 7 hours and 28 minutes | 212 MB

From religious communities to therapeutic spaces, the importance of forgiving those who’ve wronged us is often enshrined as an unqualified good. But what about horrifying cases of abuse, predatory behavior, or systemic wrong? Too often, when predators or abusers are exposed, the chorus comes immediately: “What about forgiveness?” In these cases, forgiveness places the onus on victims, diminishes real hurt and anger, lets perpetrators off the hook, and prevents justice from being done.

In Not So Sorry, journalist and culture critic Kaya Oakes tackles these questions with intelligence, nuance, and a bit of righteous anger. Ranging from Christian theology and world history to psychology and pop culture, Oakes takes us on a whirlwind tour of the many abuses of the concept of forgiveness, including the abuse scandals of the Catholic church, the outing of high-profile abusers like Larry Nassar, and white America’s obsession with false narratives of marginalized people granting forgiveness to oppressors. Ultimately, Oakes dares us to ask the necessary question: Is it ever better not to forgive?

“Kaya Oakes challenges those slippery, PR-constructed apologies that leave us rolling our eyes. But she does more than that. Throughout Not So Sorry, Kaya Oakes listens to the voices of victims, allows us to wrestle with our assumptions, and leads us on a path to restore justice.”—Rev. Carol Howard, author of Healing Spiritual Wounds: Reconnecting with a Loving God after Experiencing a Hurtful Church, and pastor of Bedford Presbyterian Church

2024 |英语| B0CYDSF5ZK | M4B 64 kbps | 7小时28分钟| 212 MB从宗教团体到治疗空间，原谅那些冤枉我们的人的重要性往往被视为一种无条件的善。但是，可怕的虐待、掠夺性行为或系统性错误怎么办？太多时候，当捕食者或施虐者被揭露时，人们会立即齐声说：“宽恕呢？”在这些情况下，宽恕会把责任推到受害者身上，减少真正的伤害和愤怒，让肇事者逍遥法外，并阻止正义得到伸张。 在《不那么抱歉》中，记者兼文化评论家Kaya Oakes以智慧、细微差别和一点正义的愤怒来解决这些问题。从基督教神学和世界历史到心理学和流行文化，奥克斯带我们旋风般地参观了宽恕概念的许多滥用行为，包括天主教会的虐待丑闻、拉里·纳萨尔等高调虐待者的出柜，以及美国白人对边缘化人向压迫者给予宽恕的虚假叙事的痴迷。最终，奥克斯让我们敢于问一个必要的问题：不原谅会更好吗？ “Kaya Oakes挑战了那些让我们翻白眼的狡猾的、公关构建的道歉。但她做的不止于此。在《不那么抱歉》中，Kaya Oaks倾听了受害者的声音，让我们与自己的假设作斗争，并带领我们走上了恢复正义的道路。”——Rev。卡罗尔·霍华德，《治愈精神创伤：在经历了一场痛苦的教会后与慈爱的上帝重新联系》一书的作者，贝德福德长老会牧师

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